that pent-up, irritating, and seemingly perennial energy that ironically drains you of motivation, leaving you physically and psychologically depleted.
It accumulates like a “jar” of bees – hungry for the honey that is your turmoil, trapped in your agony. They sing a muted buzz in the background of what is your conscious steams of thoughts, a negligible whisper that grows into a unsettling drone that grows so violent it eventually breaks the “jar” from the frequency of its vibration.
It is the negative energy that results from the inability to resolve conflict. Conflict is presented in many ways, some more so than others. However, the root of the conflict is often unclear or misdirected.
The more you try to suppress them as they breed, the denser the buzzing becomes and it is no longer just a mild noise but a physiological sensation.
The idea of being unable to control or understand something leads to feelings of helplessness – a loss of control which is easily misinterpreted into feelings of worthlessness.
However, most often than not – we are too keen on spending what little psychological energy we have left on trying to control or understand situations which we simply are not able to.
For instance – when someone throws a tantrum at you, their behaviour may be the cause of the undesirable emotions that arise and in turn you may lash out at them or another in an attempt to express your frustration. However, simply put, the “root” of the frustration is still stemmed deep in your psyche, and it will continue to grow unless you excavate it, stem and root.
Granted, many times it is unfeasable to completely remove some sources of our frustration. For example, an in-law whom your husband works with, a colleague or boss, or a family member. However, we can control the way we interpret and respond – ultimately controlling the way in which they are able to affect us. And through this, the regaining of control, we may deplete the parasite of its nurtients and it will decay and become less of a burden.
Fear of uncertainty, the inability to control or understand is human nature. It is how we manage these fears that set us apart from one another, and in some cases, it is what differenciates the optimists from the pessimists.
Insteasd of focusing energy on negative energy and in turn replicating it, a consicious shift of thought may in turn change a negative pattern of thinking. It is never too late to learn, for nothing is set in stone.
Give yourself a chance.
JAN 5 2019, INCOMPLETE