2019 September 12 00：07
Thank you, for being there for me, and for being supportive despite my hiatus.
I genuinely appreciate it and am grateful for any and all concern for my wellbeing – though I feel I can ever express it properly or adequately. I just hope this reads as sincere and you can really acknowledge the motivation and support you give me and how it has been an undeniable factor of my recovery. Yes, recovery. I do not use that word lightly – though I am in no way claiming that I have recovered. I just hope that my word vomit and unnecessarily lengthy and most likely pompous and frustratingly riddled essays of cringy feelings and probably obnoxiously self-righteous rants that read like the mini adorable thing that lives under the giant American Curl’s ear.
2019 September 12 05:53
Not quite sure what happened, I always seem to have something I want to do & the notion that if I don’t do it I’ll forget and _______ so I do it – but I end up forgetting what I was doing. And this pretty much leads to nothing actually being done to completion 😂
Before I get lost in some other trail of thought or intention for action I’m just gonna – oh. Didn’t finish editing the video. ok.
I’m just gonna start jotting stray thoughts down like this.
Sorry for being
confused confusing, but time will tell.
Sorry, I couldn’t resist being a dick. But – yeah, before I ramble – the video will explain (I hope).
Ah fuck, still havn’t ordered that pizza I want to eat and spent 2~ hours trying to sort out the order 😂
That was I believe, I thnk – around 8~ 10pm.. It is now 06:04. 😂
2019 September 12 10:48 – 5 hr (-4min)
I’m absolutely elated. Actually managed to organise & attend to things/thoughts & keep them organised & not leave a mess of unfinished things to get back to (that I usually don’t)
Right, still hadn’t finished editing the vid. If I were emotional I’d be in happy tears, it’s just so fucking comfortable to feel in control and functional – even though thoughts etc may be fragmented and erratic, the habit of leaving breadcrumbs before wandering from the original
Sidetracked again. Gonna post incomplete for now or there might not be anything at all (again)
And for my legendary patrions… I’m gonna stop borng you with gratitude – Here’s a clip of someone who looks like me failing to pretend to … dance?